Unfinity

UNF · 638 cards · Released

Baaallerina
Creature — Sheep Performer

Flying

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

: Another target creature with a name sticker on it gains flying until end of turn.

Cute as a mutton.

3/3
Bag Check
Instant

Counter target spell, then ask a person outside the game if that spell looks dangerous to them. If they say yes, draw a card, then discard a card.

"As long as there's no outside food, you're good to go."

Bamboozling Beeble
Creature — Beeble

Protection from Robots

, : The next time target player would roll one or more dice this turn, instead they roll that many dice plus one and you choose one of those rolls to ignore.

Myra bought beebles because they were cheaper than rubber ducks. Now the infestation is her largest expense.

1/1
Bioluminary
Creature — Merfolk Performer

Whenever Bioluminary deals combat damage to a player, you get , then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

The Gargantikari astroserpent hated the taste of merfolk, but the audience didn't need to know that.

1/3
Blufferfish
Creature — Fish

: An opponent tells you a statement about themselves and secretly notes whether it's true or false. You guess which it is. If you guessed correctly, this creature gets +2/+0 and can't be blocked this turn.

Lying to a fish is such an unthinkable act, most planets don't even have a law against it.

3/6
Boing!
Instant

Return target creature to its owner's hand, then roll a six-sided die. If the result is 3 or less, scry a number of cards equal to the result.

Sometimes the Astrotorium's stunts look dangerous because they absolutely are.

Busted!
Instant

Counter target spell unless its controller pays , where X is the number of words in the name with the most words among permanents you control.

"All you gotta do is panic with purpose. And plead your innocence with purpose. And have your mom bail you out with purpose."

Command Performance
Sorcery

Choose two —

• Open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

• Roll to visit your Attractions.

• You get .

• You may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Croakid Amphibonaut
Creature — Frog Guest

This creature has flying as long as you control a stickered permanent.

"I designed the Astrotorium's jetpacks to be lightweight and inexpensive. Nobody mentioned reliable."

—Truss, chief engineer

4/3
Decisions, Decisions
Sorcery

Reveal the top three cards of your library, then choose a consonant. (Y counts.) Put each card that has the chosen letter in the first word of its name from among them into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Exchange of Words
Enchantment

When this enchantment enters, choose two target creatures. For as long as this enchantment remains on the battlefield, exchange the text boxes of those creatures.

Before criticizing, walk a mile (about 1.6 kilometers) in their head. That way, when you do, you're a mile away and you have their head.

Fluros of Myra's Marvels
Legendary Creature — Merfolk Performer

As Fluros of Myra's Marvels enters, choose a number greater than 0.

Whenever you cast a spell with power, toughness, or loyalty equal to the chosen number, target artifact or creature becomes an artifact creature with base power and toughness X/X until end of turn, where X is the chosen number.

Partner

3/4
Focused Funambulist
Creature — Human Performer

Flash

As this creature enters, you may put an art sticker on the empty side of the balancing pole. When you do, ask a person outside the game "Does this look balanced?" If they say yes, you may tap or untap target creature.

2/1
Glitterflitter
Creature — Faerie Performer

Flying

When Glitterflitter enters, you get , then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

There are no small parts, only small performers.

2/2
How Is This a Par Three?!
Enchantment

Whenever you cast a spell, you may have target player mill X cards, where X is the number of words in that spell's name.

Against the infinite backdrop of space, isn't all golf miniature?

Make a _____ Splash
Enchantment

Flash

When this enchantment enters, you may put a name sticker on it.

Whenever you put a sticker on this enchantment, tap up to X target creatures, where X is the number of u's in name stickers on this enchantment.

The largest dunk tank in forty-seven galaxies.

Mobile Clone
Sorcery

Using a mobile device, take a picture of target creature. That device enters as a token that's a photocopy of the pictured creature. (Photocopies include Auras, Equipment, counters, and stickers in the shot. Don't touch other people's phones without permission and be careful if you do.)

Monitor Monitor
Creature — Human Employee

When this creature enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Once each turn, you may pay to reroll one or more dice you rolled.

Nine fires, a hull breach, and a Quafloovian meganibbler escaped from the petting zoo. Things were suspiciously quiet.

2/5
Motion Sickness
Enchantment — Aura

Enchant creature

When this Aura enters, tap enchanted creature.

Enchanted creature doesn't untap during its controller's untap step.

Whenever you visit an Attraction, you may attach this Aura to target tapped creature.

Octo Opus
Enchantment

When this enchantment enters, create a 4/4 blue Octopus Performer creature token named Contortionist with "At the beginning of your upkeep, you may fold this token in half." (It becomes 2/2, then 1/1, ½/½, and so on.)

Sacrifice this enchantment: Draw a card and an additional card for each of Contortionist's folds.

Phone a Friend
Sorcery

Call someone and ask them to choose one. If they don't answer, an opponent chooses one. (Don't explain anything else. You choose targets.)

• A — Gain control of target creature you don't control.

• B — Choose target creature you control. Create two tokens that are each copies of it.

• C — Take an extra turn after this one.

• D — Draw seven cards.

Plate Spinning
Enchantment

Whenever you cast a spell, copy it and you may choose new targets for the copy. Then balance a card from outside the game on one of your fingertips. When that card falls or touches another card, sacrifice this enchantment.

For extra style points, spin them.

Prize Wall
Creature — Wall

Defender

, : You get .

, : You may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own. Activate only as a sorcery.

"That bear's been there since the Astrotorium opened. I've seen it move."

—Ernst, deep fry cook

0/4
Seasoned Buttoneer
Creature — Vedalken Employee

When this creature enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Everyone comments on the buttons, but few appreciate the pedals.

2/2
Super-Duper Lost
Instant

Put target creature into its owner's library just beneath the top X cards of that library, where X is the number of doors you can see from your seat.

Fblthp decided to get some sleep, nestled among the plush Ajanis until morning.

Treacherous Trapezist
Creature — Porcupine Performer

Flying

Whenever you cast an alliterative spell, scry 2. (Anything with two or more capitalized words in its name that begin with the same letter is alliterative.)

Other alliterative creatures you control have flying.

2/3
_____ _____ _____ Trespasser
Creature — Human Rogue Guest

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it.

: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn for each name sticker on it. It can't be blocked this turn.

"All you gotta do is walk with purpose. And run with purpose. And clear a five-foot gate with purpose."

2/1
Unlawful Entry
Instant

Target creature gets +1/+0 and gains flying until end of turn.

Whenever you put an art sticker on a creature, you may return this card from your graveyard to your hand.

"Glaxxar, Security Bot 254 has wandered off. After lunch, throw on a spacesuit and go find it."

—Truss, chief engineer.

Vedalken Squirrel-Whacker
Creature — Vedalken Guest

As this creature enters, roll a six-sided die twice. Its base power becomes the first result and its base toughness becomes the second result.

If you would roll one or more six-sided dice, instead roll them and you may exchange one result with this creature's base power or base toughness.

*/*
Wizards of the _____
Creature — Human Wizard Performer

When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it, then look at the top X cards of your library, where X is the number of unique vowels on that sticker. Put one of those cards into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Magic is the name of the game.

3/1
Animate Graveyard
Enchantment — Aura

Enchant your graveyard

Enchanted graveyard is a creature on the battlefield with base power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It has the text boxes of all creature cards in it. It's still a graveyard.

If enchanted graveyard would leave the battlefield, instead exile this Aura.

Attempted Murder
Sorcery

Choose target creature. Roll X six-sided dice. For each even result, put two -1/-1 counters on that creature. For each odd result, create a 1/2 blue Bird creature token with flying named Storm Crow.

Squawks was quick to establish the social pecking order.

Black Hole
Sorcery

Destroy target creature and up to X other target creatures, where X is the number of Attractions you've visited this turn.

"Code Dark Donut! Code Dark Donut! All available fun specialists, please report to the Roil Coaster immediately!"

—Truss, chief engineer

Carnival Carnivore
Creature — Alien Crab Horror

Deathtouch

When Carnival Carnivore enters, you get , then you may put a sticker on a nonland permanent you own.

Somehow only the third-most dangerous ride in the park.

4/6
Deadbeat Attendant
Creature — Vampire Employee

When this creature enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Some people will hire anyone with a pulse. Myra isn't that picky.

1/1
Discourtesy Clerk
Creature — Vampire Employee

When this creature enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

At the beginning of your end step, if you control three or more Attractions, you draw a card and you lose 1 life.

Myra doesn't pay the vampires to smile—but only because guests found it off-putting.

3/2
Disemvowel
Sorcery

Destroy target creature. That creature's controller loses 1 life for each unique vowel in the creature's name. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

Without vowels, no one can hear you scream.

Dissatisfied Customer
Creature — Vampire Guest

Flying, haste

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. If the result is 3 or less, you lose that much life.

The mirrors weren't fun for everyone.

2/1
Down for Repairs
Sorcery

Target opponent reveals their hand. You choose a nonland card from it. That player discards that card. Destroy up to one target Attraction that player controls. (It's put into their junkyard.)

Safety twelfth.

Exit Through the Grift Shop
Sorcery

Yell "Who wants a souvenir?" and announce the name of a nonland card in your graveyard. Each player in an Un-game who can hear you may bid life. You start the bidding at 0. The high bidder loses life equal to the high bid. They copy the card and may cast the copy without paying its mana cost. If you didn't win the bid, you gain life equal to the high bid and create that many Treasure tokens.

Gray Merchant of Alphabet
Creature — Zombie Performer

When this creature enters, choose a letter. For each creature you control that has the chosen letter in its name, you gain 1 life and each opponent loses 1 life.

Like any young zombie, Gary dreamed of escaping the underworld to join the circus.

2/4
Haberthrasher
Creature — Human Hatificer Assassin

Deathtouch

Whenever another creature you control that has a hat enters or a hat sticker is put on a creature you control, each opponent loses 1 life.

"Brims" Barone's enforcers are always dressed to kill.

2/2
Knife and Death
Sorcery

Just a second (As long as this spell is on the stack, players can't move permanents.)

One at a time, throw ten cards you own from outside the game onto the playing area from a distance of at least three feet (about one meter). For each of those cards, Knife and Death deals 1 damage to each creature or planeswalker you don't control that card is touching. You gain life equal to the damage dealt this way.

Last Voyage of the _____
Enchantment

When this enchantment enters, you may put a name sticker on it, then it becomes an Aura with enchant creature. Return a creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield and attach this Aura to it.

Enchanted creature gets +2/+0 for each name sticker on this Aura with seven or fewer letters.

When this Aura leaves the battlefield, sacrifice enchanted creature.

"Lifetime" Pass Holder
Creature — Zombie Guest

This creature enters tapped.

When this creature dies, open an Attraction.

Whenever you roll to visit your Attractions, if you roll a 6, you may return this card from your graveyard to the battlefield.

2/1
Line Cutter
Creature — Human Rogue Guest

When this creature enters, roll to visit your Attractions.

Waiting is for chumps with flimsy spacesuits.

3/4
Night Shift of the Living Dead
Enchantment

After you roll a die, you may pay 1 life. If you do, increase or decrease the result by 1. Do this only once each turn.

Whenever you roll a 6, create a 2/2 black Zombie Employee creature token.

At the Astrotorium, even the dead make a living wage.

Nocturno of Myra's Marvels
Legendary Creature — Vampire Performer

As Nocturno of Myra's Marvels enters, choose a word with five or more letters.

Whenever you cast a spell with the chosen word in its rules text, you draw a card and you lose 2 life.

Partner (You can have two commanders if both have partner.)

2/2
Photo Op
Sorcery

Before the game begins, you may post a picture of yourself posing like the art of any Magic card with #GuessThatMagicCard and no other text.

You may reveal a reply posted today with a guess and a card you own from outside the game with the same name as that guess. Put that card into your hand. Exile Photo Op.

Questionable Cuisine
Sorcery

Return up to two target creature cards from your graveyard to your hand. Create a Food token for each trash can you can see from your seat. (It's an artifact with ", , Sacrifice this token: You gain 3 life.")

May contain soy. May contain a deep void, chillingly hoarse and howling without voice. May contain gluten.

Quick Fixer
Creature — Azra Employee

Menace

Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

Myra doesn't believe in stopping rides for minor inconveniences like "they need to be repaired."

2/3
Rat in the Hat
Creature — Rat Rogue

, Sacrifice this creature: Until end of turn, you may cast target creature card that has a hat from your graveyard.

While the gremlin, beeble, and squirrel infestations wrecked havoc on the park, Roxi was able to spin the numerous rat colonies as a "robust recycling program."

1/2
A Real Handful
Creature — Alien Child Guest

As long as one or more hands are touching this creature, it gets +2/+2.

As long as two or more hands are touching this creature, it has menace.

As long as three or more hands are touching this creature, it has lifelink.

1/1
Saw in Half
Instant

Destroy target creature. If that creature dies this way, its controller creates two tokens that are copies of that creature, except their power is half that creature's power and their toughness is half that creature's toughness. Round up each time.

The audience always loves it, but volunteers are divided.

Scampire
Creature — Vampire Employee

When Scampire enters, you get , then you may put a sticker on a creature card in your graveyard.

: Return target creature card with a sticker on it from your graveyard to the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step. Activate only as a sorcery.

1/3
Scared Stiff
Creature — Zombie Coward Guest

This creature has menace as long as you control a stickered permanent.

The horrors of Sorin's Haunted Mansion scared Hurrk half to life.

3/2
Scooch
Instant

Add or subtract 1 from target creature's power, target player's life total, or target die roll's result.

Draw a card.

"What? No, that's ridiculous! Of course the rat doesn't work for the park. I've never seen it before in my life!"

—Monoxa, midway manager

Six-Sided Die
Instant

Choose target creature. Roll a six-sided die.

1 — It has base toughness 1 until end of turn.

2 — Put two -1/-1 counters on it.

3 — Six-Sided Die deals 3 damage to it and you gain 3 life.

4 — It gets -4/-4 until end of turn.

5 — Destroy it.

6 — Exile it.

Soul Swindler
Creature — Demon Employee

As long as you've visited an Attraction this turn, this creature has indestructible. (Damage and effects that say "destroy" don't destroy it.)

When this creature enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

"Three tries to decide your fate! Fabulous prizes! Probably no untold torment!"

5/3
Step Right Up
Sorcery

Open two Attractions. (Put the top two cards of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)

"Ah, the midway, beating heart of the—well, maybe the big top is the heart. If there were two hearts then the midway—or the lungs. Lungs or stomach!"

—Captain Rex Nebula